Emotional scenes as bin men record loudest noise in human history

There were emotional scenes this morning after a group of bin men produced the loudest ever sound on the surface of the planet. 

GETinCompetitions-logoIt was 7:30 AM local time when the noise emerged from a sleepy neighbourhood on the edge of Dundonald.

Jubilant refuse collectors celebrated wildly after producing a sound which registered at an astonishing 194 decibels.

It’s believed to have circled the Earth five times in every direction and shattered the eardrums of Portavogie fishermen 30 miles away.

The record-breaking noise was generated by two bin men who repeatedly shouted ‘Yo’ at each other from across the street.

The earth-shattering sound smashed windows and flattened trees while local residents still in their night attire spilled into the street with blood streaming from their ears.

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One eyewitness, 38-year-old Joe McMelter, told assembled journalists about this morning’s events using sign language:

‘I thought I’d treat myself to a wee lie in this morning seeing as how I’m still off work due to this corona ballix’.

‘Around 7.25am I heard an unnecessarily loud and squeaking mechanical device which I’ve since been informed was a bin lorry. I mean for f**k sake would somebody just oil the thing’.

‘I stuck a pilla’ over my head and thought I’d be able to fall back over. But that’s when it started’.

Joe broke down in tears as he described the sound which caused him irreversible ear damage:

‘Yo… Yo… Yo… each ‘Yo’ getting progressively louder until my eardrum completely ruptured’, he wept.

Meanwhile, the record-breaking refuse collectors known as ‘Sammy and Davy’, have dedicated their feat to all the bin men across the globe.

‘A big shout out to all our colleagues around the world’, guldered the pair.

 

 

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