Man reports his ‘mokentroll’ missing to PSNI

The PSNI has issued an urgent appeal for information that might help them locate a Dundonald man’s ‘mokenroll’.

The small infrared device is believed to be in the man’s living room but police are not ruling out that it may be somewhere else.

39-year-old Sam Sung of Culross Drive in Ballybeen Estate reported his ‘mokentroll’ missing after a frantic two minute search this morning.

Mr Sung told officers he was about to tune into Judge Rinder when he realised the device was no longer resting on his gut.

The taxi driver claims to have searched ‘high and low’ for the gadget for almost two full minutes before deciding to alert the authorities.

‘I was just about to stick yer man Rinder on when I realised the mokentroll wasn’t on my belly’, recalled Sam.

‘I tried not to panic and had a quick feel down either side of me, but still no sign of my mokentroll’.

‘That’s when I had to take the drastic measure of standing up to see if it had slipped under my hole, but no’.

‘At my wits end, I lifted up the cushions and ran my hand along the back of the sofa’.

‘All I found was a couple of 2ps, a lotta crumbs and a lollipop with some dubious looking hairs on it’.

‘That’s when I decided to phone the peelers’.

Officers arrived on the scene to find Mr Sung sobbing and randomly pressing buttons on the side of his television set.

‘We would ask that should anyone see Sam’s mokentroll, or a device matching its description please contact 101. We’ve f**k all better to be doing’, said a spokesperson for the PSNI.

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