Local woman orders Chinese as soon as she’s home from holiday

A Dundonald woman ordered ‘her usual’ from the local Chinese takeaway just minutes after arriving home from holiday, it has emerged.

Helen McMelter was barely through the front door when she instructed her partner Joe to ‘get on the phone til l’Chinkers’.

‘All I could think about on the plane was my salted chilli prawns, fried rice and a portion of curry sauce’, explained Helen.

‘As soon Joe brought the cases in, I says to him, place an order for collection, luv. It’s f**kin chockablock on a Friday night. You’d be waitin 45 minutes to an hour for a delivery’.

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This week’s offer at Fletcher Meats

Helen, who spent 10 days in Benidorm drinking in an Irish pub and ate nothing but Ulster Fries or Champ & Sausages, claims the time was right to come home.

’10 days is just enough isn’t it?’, she asked.

‘I mean, a week’s too short. You feel like you’ve only got there and the next thing you’re packing your case again’.

‘And 2 weeks is too bloody long. I’d miss my ma too much. No, 10 days is just perfect’, she added.

And so, while Joe was picking up the Chinese, Helen got the plates, knives and forks out.

‘I hope that dickhead told them to give me my curry sauce separately. He never checks the bloody beg before he leaves’, barked Helen.

We caught up with Joe when he pulled up outside the house with the Chinese and asked if he’d checked the order was correct before leaving the take-away.

‘Ah f**k’, sobbed Joe.

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